Dating someone in an open relationship

Every time someone chooses you, it affirms your relationship – even more so if they have a choice to be with someone else.If your partner is flirting with someone else but comes home with you, they do so in freedom.Others did not, but I still assumed they were at risk whenever a thinner, younger, more attractive, different woman was around.Dating Charles meant I had to reconcile myself to being one of many, but I also discovered that did nothing to lessen my appeal.

Daily life in long-term relationships can make it hard to feel that excitement, let alone communicate it.

I can't count the number of times I heard "You're wasting your time" or "You'll never meet anyone else." But buoyed by the confidence and happiness that comes from a healthy relationship, I was more able to recognize and accept the right guy when he came along.

And my experiences on the periphery of non-monogamy taught me a lot about relationships, lessons I'm applying in my new, monogamous relationship.

"When they leave me, it's usually for The One," my lover, Charles, said.

I was gushing about the new man in my life, and Charles was adjusting admirably to the news. That's the deal for a man in a polyamorous, open marriage who dates multiple partners.

Even knowing Charles was juggling multiple partners, I never doubted how important I was to him, because he never left an information gap for me to fill in.